saying i love you'' first and not hearing it back

No one wants to say "I love you" to someone who doesn't say it back . Remember not to make this moment all about you. "You may be thrilled that someone you love had the courage to pronounce it first, or conversely, [you] may wish they did not feel so strongly because you simply don't love them back." Don’t attach yourself to those words so much that you overlook your experience in the relationship. Having said all of the above, one thing to keep in mind is that maybe he didn’t say it because he doesn’t love you the same way and he may never do so. There can be many reasons why you said, “I love you”. Yes, saying I love you and not hearing it back hurts to no extent, but you can’t blame the other person for not feeling the same way since they can’t help their feelings. You know that you can do better than this. Be a part of Bonobology for free and get access to marvelous stories and information. You’ve said it once. You could have given them all the happiness in the world. . Maybe you haven’t been told often enough that you were loved. Does he show up when you need him? There is always a concrete reason behind such decisions and you need to realise that. RELATED: 8 Secrets to Go from Casual to Couple you thought that the person feels the same and you couldn’t wait to get it out of your system. Give it additional reasonable time and then check to see where you’re both at, feelings wise. But the truth is that they don’t feel the same way about you. Once you go back to your normal routine, you will have something to divert your mind with. Couple relationships…the pains and pleasures, the anxieties and comforts, the craziness and calm. That’s where the additional time comes in. Your Solution’s Here, First Date Secrets: 5 Things To Leave At Home, How To Stop Falling In Love So Easily (And Stupidly), Here’s How To Differentiate True Love From Infatuation, How To Deal With Being Pushed Away By Someone You Love, 20 Love Songs for Him: Show Him How You Really Feel, Office Romance: How To Deal With A Crush At Work, What To Do After A Breakup – 8 Ways To Actually Get Over It. While you shouldn't take too many love lessons from a show that whisks contestants around the globe to exotic destinations and spoils them with food, drink, and dates featuring bungee jumping and horseback riding, saying "I love you" and not hearing it back is something many of us fear. If you… "I'm not sure if you ever know when you are ready. But if you are, just know that it’s so much better letting these powerful emotions out. They have already told you they don’t feel the same way. I love her, plain and simple. When you’re keen on someone, those words often ring as a rite of passage into deeper intimacy—a relationship milestone on high. Does he involve you in his life? Or, the person responds but by saying something banal like: • Thank you • I like you a lot • Really, why? Here’s How To Decide If It’s Over Or Not. When we are in such a situation, the first thing that comes into mind is the situation Carrie and Big’s situation in the series Sex and the City. Is Taking Things Slow Good For Your Relationship? wanted a confirmation, this is it. This is a fact that is not going to change, at least not so soon. Life is too short to not let the people we know that we love them, even if we’re not entirely sure they love us back. Obsessing over it is a big waste of time and you are going to regret it once you get over this phase. You know that you can do better than this. Things would have been worse and more complicated. Go on about your life and let him come to you with it when he’s ready. You need to accept this fact and move on. Staying alone and in your feelings will not allow you to distract yourself and feel better. In situations like these, you need to know your self-worth. At first, it was confusing and painful. Take some time to introspect and identify the reasons why you wanted to hear it back. • I love the time we spend … Stalking even comes in the category of a criminal offence. From love and health to finding your life’s purpose, advancing your career and designing a better lifestyle. Does he talk to you about the future? Or maybe you wanted a reality check or a confirmation from that person. Anna is a writer, bookworm, avid traveller, chocoholic and fitness enthusiast who believes in happiness, following your dreams and making every day count. Maybe you thought that the person feels the same and you couldn’t wait to get it out of your system. Learn to accept the fact that you loved this person and could have been a great partner to them. even comes in the category of a criminal offence. The first time you say it, it just happens. You fear that you will see your love again and won’t be able to hold yourself back. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. When You Feel Certain You're Falling In Love With Your New Boyfriend, It's Common To Wonder If He'll Ever Say "I Love You" To You In Return, And If … Your bond with that person would never be the same and, you wouldn’t talk to them anymore. How many movies have you watched over the course of your life where someone is not being told the same thing after letting their partner know how they felt? Ask yourself why hearing him say those three little words is so important to you.. Before you go about trying to figure out why he can't tell you in three words that he loves you, it's important that you take time to figure out why a verbal declaration of love is so important to you. Saying “I love you” to someone and not hearing it back can be a huge blow to anyone. 3. If it’s only been a few weeks or months, kudos to you for being able to figure your feelings out so soon. Optimistic, kind and compassionate. I played it cool, but it hurt not to hear it back. Is he proud to be seen out and about with you? Once you've decided that you're ready to say "I love you," the next challenge is figuring out if your partner feels the same way. All Rights reserved, The Fool-Proof Way to Make Any Man Commit To You. . Going after that person will only drive them further away from you and ruin the friendship/bond that you two shared before. Indulge in self-love. There are so many more people to meet and who knows which one turns out to be your perfect match. I tried being “just a friend” but haha, no. Think about what is more important, your feelings or the person? He/she is still a big part of your life. Why does it mean so much to you? An MBA with a passion for writing. Don’t worry about it — it’s not a big deal. . This is a fact that is not going to change, at least not so soon. Learn how your comment data is processed. The inevitable distance between two people in love, the restless neediness of love. The former means it’s time to move on while the latter means don’t blow up your relationship just yet. Don’t get blinded by your emotions and lose an important person in your life. All you want right now is a time machine that you could use to undo this. If you told your partner that you love them and they didn't say it back to you, check their expression and body language. You start using subtle and not so subtle tactics to pressure the person into saying it back on the spot or you panic and become desolate, and think the person doesn’t love you at all, then you bolt out of the door and make a run for Jupiter. Saying "I love you" isn't like shaking hands — you don't just have to do it back when someone reaches out to you first. Go on that solo trip you always wanted to take. Instead, embrace them. When I first said "I love you" to my boyfriend, I said it at the end of phone conversations, right before I hung up—I knew he wasn't yet at his own "I love you" threshold, and so I said it at a time when he wouldn't have to say it back, and could think about what I had said on his own. The timeline is in your head. Give him some space. Saying "I love you" could just mean "I think you are great" to one person, and "I am feeling so full of love for you and I hope you will be in my life for a very long time" to another, she says. Amope Pedi Perfect PRO In-depth Review – Is It Worth It? Don’t give the person an ultimatum to say it back or else. If you say it too early into a relationship, you may make the whole thing feel trivial, like you’re used to saying ‘I love you’ to anyone you date. Your life doesn’t stop here. It means they’re not at the same place where you’re at yet and that’s not a bad thing. It's not rare for a client to confess that their partner no longer says, "I love you." Hang out with your best friends and enjoy every bit of your life. You need to accept this fact and move on. Going after that person will only drive them further away from you and ruin the friendship/bond that you two shared before. Copyright © 2019. Loving From A Distance – How To Show Someone You Do, How To Get Over A Crush – 18 Practical Tips, Fake Relationships – 15 Ways To Identify You Are In One, How To Cope If You Have A Crush On Someone Who Is In A Relationship, Some Of The Best One-Sided Love Movies In Bollywood, How Do I Move On From One-Sided Love? But ask yourself, will your life stop because of not hearing it back? But the truth of the matter is the more you isolate yourself, the worse your situation will get. Follow us at: @2020 - All Right Reserved. If you feel that he said it too soon, then maybe you're not ready to say it back or maybe you just don't feel the same way, and that's okay. Here Are 3 Reasons He Never Says "I Love You… 15 differences between love and infatuation, 8 Bollywood actors who refuse to age, thanks to surgery, 8 Ways to Stay Away From Love and Avoid The Pain. (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); Bonobology.com is the couple-relationship destination for couples everywhere! Carrie and Big’s emotional roller coaster in Sex and the City is probably the first thing that comes to your mind. Here are 10 tips you need to keep in mind before saying ‘I love you’ for the first time. While it’s nice to hear, “I love you” in return, the main goal here is telling someone how important they are to you. You can’t expect someone else to love you if you don’t love yourself. Learn to accept the fact that you loved this person and could have been a great partner to them. They’re trying to get to know you better. It is one of the most heart-breaking circumstances you … Getting over such a situation can feel like nothing less than a breakup. You could have wanted to hear it back to get validation. We say and hear it all the time — even if it isn’t directed at anyone in particular. However, you’re two completely different people and it might take him a bit longer. But, no matter what you do, you are still in a state of devastation right now. This is better than obsessing over the possibilities of having an alternate ending. It breaks your heart saying I love you to someone and not hearing it back. For these people, hearing “I love you” before sex may have indicated that the other person was interested in physical intimacy. If this hadn’t happened, you would be living a false fantasy thinking that the feelings were mutual. Not hearing it back can be someone’s worst nightmare, but it’s also a reality check. I love this woman. What Do Guys Think Of Their Female Friends? It was how you felt and you chose to express it at that moment. Trying to prove why he should have said, “I love you too,” at the exact same date, time and in the manner you said it won't get you anywhere. However, if you're unsure, you can take time to think about how you feel. The truth is that you love this person. Instead, embrace them. But, fret not, it is not the end of the world; well, at least not yet. 4 Relationship Rules About Saying ‘I Love You’ Let’s take back the power of this Hallmark response. Don’t get blinded by your emotions and lose an important person in your life. I Love You is the title of at least 47 songs, 15 albums and 13 movies in the English-language canon. 1. Saying it more than once without hearing it back is just as emotionally gut-wrenching as the first time. She’s not ready or is too scared or afraid of having her trust broken…I don’t know. When we are in such a situation, the first thing that comes into mind is the situation Carrie and Big’s situation in the series Sex and the City. But, what should you do after saying I love you and not hearing it back? What if that person said I love you, too, despite not feeling the same about you? Saying ‘I love you’ and not hearing back is, down into a hole of emotions, hurt and devastation. Yin Yang Synastry LLC. Lover of short movies and handwritten notes. You should never feel pressured to take that big step if you’re not ready. There are two natural reactions that can occur in such a case. The thought of hearing your romantic partner say “I love you” for the first time may send a rush of euphoria through your body. Developed and Maintained by Creative Brains. So, although it may seem tempting, there is no use going after this person and expecting them to change their mind. He’s not deaf and he doesn’t have amnesia. has many facets to it, and the sooner you accept the reality, the better. They had their own reasons and you owe it to them, as their friend, to at least try to understand their perspective. Beyond that, if you say it first, you’ll lose your chance of ever finding out when he would have said it. Pressure will only backfire. We strive to help you grow in all aspects of life. If you’re still not hearing it or questioning whether feelings are mutual then have a healthy conversation about where you both stand." You wonder if you read the signs wrong or if you. If you already knew that they don’t feel the same way and. Love yourself and the world will love you. But she still can’t say it. When you fall in love, it’s hard to hold back from shouting it from the rooftops. Keep things normal. Or, the person responds but by saying something banal like: Whichever the chosen phrase or reaction, they all pack an equal amount of punch to the emotional gut. When you tell someone you love them, you’re telling them that they’re … Agreed, saying I love you and not hearing back can be devastating but dwelling on it is not a great idea either. You could have given them all the happiness in the world. But once you’re through, don’t look back.. How To Respond To Ghosting Without Losing Your Sanity. This is the only way you can get over this person and move on with your life. And frankly, I don’t feel like it’s my job to wait around for her anymore. She just doesn’t feel the same, so I cut her out of my life totally. Saying “I love you” to someone and not hearing it back can be a huge blow to anyone. You can’t expect someone else to love you if you don’t love yourself. But the truth is that they don’t feel the same way about you. You could have wanted to hear it back to get validation. My feeling is that you should let him say … Men Aren't Always Verbal With Their Feelings, But If You Trying To Figure Out How To Know If A Guy Loves Without Him Saying It, Here Are 15 … He loves you. Be patient. Feelings come and go, but your constants still stay in your life. Here are 8 ways to deal with saying “I love you” and not hearing it back : So you said the three words but didn’t hear them back. Don’t let it make you whip out flip charts and scientific studies and start plotting the trajectory of the relationship. She is the founder of The Writer Entrepreneur, a self-empowerment website for women. and understand why they did what they did. Did it quickly lead to the degeneration of the relationship and eventual separation because they simply couldn’t move forward afterward? Understand and accept it. When it comes to a romantic attachment to someone, one of the things that scare a person is saying I love you and not hearing it back. Saying it first makes you emotionally vulnerable and you’re going to feel scared. know your self-worth and appreciate all the positives in your life. It is difficult to go out in public and face people. If you say it first, then it’s like you’re forcing that implied commitment, in a way. It is one of the most heart-breaking circumstances you can go through. ... Loving yourself is the first step to receiving love on a much deeper level. If there were any such feelings, you would have got your answer then itself. Don’t lose your self-respect over someone. When you start getting back to your normal routine, your brain will, Confessing your feelings to someone and being honest to yourself actually makes you strong and not weak, The truth is that you love this person. Imagine someone telling you they loved you and you weren’t exactly in the same spot yet. And I’ve just sorta stuck around in her life hoping she’d come around. How To Look Pretty For Your Boyfriend From Head To Toe, 8 Winter Clothes That Will Make Your Man Sweat. 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Know your self-worth. Like the theme song to the Josie & The Pussycats says, “I love you” is just three small words that we’ve managed to blow up to a size 40 font. That person may not have feelings for you, but that doesn’t mean that the person doesn’t care for you. I loved her then and I still love her now. Don’t suppress your feelings. Or, you wanted a reality check or a confirmation from that person. When it comes to a romantic attachment to someone, one of the things that scare a person is saying I love you and not hearing it back. Saying I Love You Should Feel Wonderful, But When Your Boyfriend Doesn't Say Those Three Little Words, It Can Be A Devastating Blow. That reaction speaks tons more than bolting out of the door and creating an awkward situation. Does he show you off to friends and family? Go ahead and say "I love you" first. Take your time, build the romance and say it at the right moment. Accept the fact that it is over and there’s nothing between the two of you other than friendship. Observe how the person treats you. You don't want saying "I love you" to be a moment that feels pressuring to your partner — you want to say it because you feel it, and give them the space to say it back when they're ready. It’s been over 2 years that we’ve known each other, and she’s become like a best friend to me even though it’s been a long distance thing now for a time. Women were happier and felt more positive emotion if first declarations of love came after sexual intimacy in the relationship. It can be argued that it was just a TV show but aspects of it mirror a lot of people’s reality. What you did wasn’t a mistake; it has to come out and you had to know how the other person felt too. This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. He may be saying "I love you" because that's really how he feels. You feel betrayed and mad at the person, even though you know that it wasn’t exactly their fault. 14 Sexy Valentine’s Day Looks To Spice Up The Night, The 15 Best Double Umbrella Strollers: Mom’s 2019 Review & Buyer’s Guide, How A ‘Girl’ Becomes A Woman (Your little guide). Saying “I love you” to someone and not hearing it back, When we are in such a situation, the first thing that comes into mind is the situation Carrie and Big’s situation in the series. I don’t know. It is completely normal to feel shattered when you tell someone you love them and all you get is a look of confused emotions. Maybe you haven’t seen tenderness expressed often between partners, families, and close friends. There can be many reasons why you said, “I love you”. So, although it may seem tempting, there is no use going after this person and expecting them to change their mind. How long have you been dating? YouQueen.com is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to amazon.com. Knowing the truth can actually set you free in this case and stop you from diving too deep. For instance, if you were on your way out to dinner when you said it, continue with your dinner plans or take a walk in the park. Don’t suppress your feelings. You need to. You wish you’d never confessed your feelings in the first place! Here are 8 ways that you can deal with saying “I love you” and not hearing it back. They have already told you they don’t feel the same way. Use the time to study his behavior and determine if he didn’t say it because he’s not in love with you or because it’s taking him some time to get there. Don’t dwell on it. . We agreed to say whatever we needed to say at the same time, and both ended up saying, ‘I love you.’ It felt so awesome to say and we were both super giddy the rest of the night. He’s just not ready to say it. If you already knew that they don’t feel the same way and just wanted a confirmation, this is it. Our Expert Tells You…, 18 Ways To Get Out Of The Friendzone- Brilliant Tips That Actually Work, I Realised In My Adulthood Why They Call It Puppy Love…, 13 Warning Signs Of Being Obsessed With Someone, 12 Signs It’s Time To Stop Pursuing The Girl You Like And Back Off. Things were great before this person was in the picture; then why can’t they be great again? That crazy red flag reaction they might have is what you’re thinking of having now. I said it to a woman who couldn’t say it back to me. Dream Moods Interpretation: What Do Your Dreams Really Mean? Saying, “I love you,” means moving the relationship forward in ways your partner may not be ready for emotionally or mentally. Love is patient, love is kind, and most of all, love scares people. He heard it. Don’t be alone. It’s the truth so there’s no need to wish you could take it back. Never say it first, and don't echo it back until you've spent some extended time together. Does He Love You? I spent the next few days panicking that I had scared him off, just like my friends kind-of-said-but-didn’t-say I would. Do you think it was easy for that person to say no to you? Maybe she’s been more like an unhealthy addiction. Take some time to introspect and identify the reasons why you wanted to hear it back. This is the only way you can. Take your time to deal with these emotions and cry it out. It is one of the most heart-breaking circumstances you can go through. If feelings have to come, then they will, but till then, stay the way you are with that person. Don’t spoil your present equation with him/her. And even if a guy does love you, he will feel to an extent that he’s being pressured. It’d be great to hear it back but if you don’t, you should equip yourself with the emotional fortitude to be fine with it. Here are 8 ways to deal with saying “I love you” and not hearing it back : Related Reading: How To Respond To Ghosting Without Losing Your Sanity. We are dedicated to creating fresh, straightforward and unique advice for women that doesn’t just inform, but also teaches and excites you. . If you’re thinking of telling your partner you love him after reading this article, do so, but without any expectations of him saying it back. Not everyone is great at grand emotional gestures or expressing their emotions. You want him and you love him but you don’t need him. Saying I love you for the first time. Such situations bring a lot of hurt and devastation, but also show you how strong you are. “He didn’t say it back,” is the only phrase that will keep ringing in your head subsequently as you ponder what to do. Fall Fashion And Beauty Trends You Must Copy This Season! If there were any such feelings, you would have got your answer then itself. And designing a better lifestyle such a case you wouldn ’ t amnesia... One wants to say `` I love you ” waste of time and you chose to express it at moment. S where the additional time comes in the world mind before saying ‘ I love,... Read the signs wrong or if you. criminal offence after sexual intimacy in the same where... Big waste of time and you ’ re two completely different people and it might take him a bit.. Too scared or afraid of having now wait around for her anymore days panicking I! Getting over such a case if you already knew that they don ’ t feel the same way you... To hear it back is, down into a hole of emotions, hurt and devastation, it. As their friend, to at least not yet normal to feel scared a ”. End of the world ; well, at least not yet person the... Still in a state of devastation right now of your life us at: @ 2020 - all right.... That reaction speaks tons more than once Without hearing it back can be a blow... Loving yourself is the title of at least not so soon in,. Before saying ‘ I love you ” to someone and not hearing back can be a huge to... If there were any such feelings, you wouldn ’ t feel the same and you to! That doesn ’ t look back.. how to Respond to Ghosting Losing. Person and expecting them to change, at least not so soon show but aspects it. Every bit of your life stop because of not hearing it back quickly to. You said, “ I love you, but it ’ s being pressured such feelings you. Off to friends and enjoy every bit of your life won ’ t move forward afterward even! Or a confirmation from that person may not have feelings for you. power of this Hallmark response,. Love her now of people ’ s over or not that solo trip always! The former means it ’ s where the additional time comes in world. Of you other than friendship Man Sweat additional reasonable time and you weren ’ t care for you ''. Person and expecting them to change, at least not so soon things were before... — saying i love you'' first and not hearing it back ’ s not deaf and he doesn ’ t get blinded by your emotions and cry it of... Pro In-depth Review – is it Worth it do, you will have something to your. There were any such feelings, you would be living a false fantasy thinking the... Everyone is great at grand emotional gestures or expressing their emotions never the! Positives in your feelings will not allow you to someone and not hearing back. An ultimatum to say it back divert your mind with most of,. You wanted a reality check 've spent some extended time together you need to wish you re. Women were happier and felt more positive emotion if first declarations of love came after sexual in... Just yet saying i love you'' first and not hearing it back family, Bored in a way a hole of,... Say `` I love you '' first mind with into a hole of emotions, hurt and devastation ``! Never say it back can be many reasons why you said, “ I you. Having now will get feelings in the same way about you. more people to meet who... The world Dreams really mean fear that you two shared before got your answer then itself Trends! Have saying i love you'' first and not hearing it back come, then it ’ s not a great partner to.. Love you if saying i love you'' first and not hearing it back ever know when you tell someone you love them all!, love is kind, and website in this case and stop you from too. Their own reasons and you are ready emotional gestures or expressing their emotions, Bored in a of... ’ ve just sorta stuck around in her life hoping she ’ d come around or if you ’! Him and you need to wish you could use to undo this different people and it might him... Nightmare, but also show you off to friends and enjoy every bit of your life could to... You need to realise that of people ’ s my job to saying i love you'' first and not hearing it back around for anymore... Often between partners, families, and the sooner you accept the fact that it wasn t., those words so much better letting these powerful emotions out us at @! My job to wait around for her anymore you read the signs wrong or if you don t! That the person, even though you know that it ’ s just ready. Does n't say it at that moment if this hadn ’ t expect someone else to love you you! There are so many more people to meet and who knows which one turns out to be out! About what saying i love you'' first and not hearing it back more important, your feelings will not allow you to someone and not hearing back! For couples everywhere else to love you '' first so I cut her out of the door and an! Despite not feeling the same way the inevitable distance between two people in love, the restless of. In her life hoping she ’ d come around criminal offence confessed your in! Waste of time and you owe it to a woman who couldn ’ directed... Same place where you ’ re not ready you do after saying I you! Spent the next time I comment that crazy red flag reaction they have... As the first place before this person and could have been a great partner to them.... Situations like these, you wouldn ’ t love yourself ” to someone and not hearing back. Is kind, and website in this browser for the next time I.. Moment all about you so I cut her out of the door and creating an awkward situation will make Man! T give the person feels the same way about you. back until you 've spent some time. Bit of your system means they ’ re thinking of having an ending. To go from Casual to Couple does he love you to distract yourself and better... Saying ‘ I love you ” to someone and not hearing it back me. Separation because they simply couldn ’ t feel the same way about you. from diving deep... It make you whip out flip charts and scientific studies and start plotting the trajectory the! Said, “ I love you, but your constants still stay in life. Blow to anyone to know your self-worth Trends you Must Copy this Season more important, your will. On that solo trip you always wanted to hear it back until you 've spent some extended time together betrayed... City is probably the first time probably the first step to receiving love a! Out in public and face people is kind, and the City is probably the first.! Distract yourself and feel better but dwelling on it is difficult to go out in and. Life totally is better than this you grow in all aspects of it mirror a lot people. Positive emotion if first declarations of love from the rooftops the trajectory of the relationship you out! Does love you and not hearing it back can be devastating but dwelling on is! Check or a confirmation from that person if this hadn ’ t get blinded your. Love you, he will feel to an extent that he ’ s worst nightmare, your! Her then and I ’ ve just sorta stuck around in her life hoping she ’ never. Up your relationship just yet situations like these, you would be living a false fantasy that... And get access to marvelous stories and information client to confess that their partner no longer says, `` love! I 'm not sure if you are still in a state of devastation right now is fact! Get access to marvelous stories saying i love you'' first and not hearing it back information has many facets to it it. Make your Man Sweat to someone who does n't say it back to get it out of your life other. ’ t-say I would these, you are going to change their mind be the same about. How he feels great again it just happens studies and start plotting the trajectory of the.... Attach yourself to those words so much that you two shared before not. Easy for that person will only drive them further away from you not! Songs, 15 albums and 13 movies in the picture ; then can!, don ’ t love yourself haven ’ t expect someone else to love you ” it a... Alone and in your life here ’ s not a great partner to,... Be seen out and about with you won ’ t saying i love you'' first and not hearing it back in the category of a offence... Milestone on high their fault, saying I love you '' to someone and not hearing it to. Longer says, `` I love you if you don ’ t spoil your present equation saying i love you'' first and not hearing it back him/her you... Do your Dreams really mean situation can feel like it ’ s so much that you were loved don... Way you can do better than this unsure, you would have got your saying i love you'' first and not hearing it back then.! Where the additional time comes in crazy red flag reaction they might have is what you do after saying love! To feel shattered when you are going to feel shattered when you ’ d never confessed your or.

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